Bears and Twinkle Lights

There is something about this part of the year that makes me understand why bears hibernate. After the refreshing warm breezes of Spring, the outside water activities and bbqs of Summer and the beautiful colors of Fall....there is Winter. Winter (which isn't so bad in the beginning because though everything looks dead there are still the twinkle lights of Christmas) is ugly! This area doesn't get beautiful snow, just dead trees and grass. It isn't even February yet and already pretty patterned scarves and matching gloves aren't doing it for me. I NEED MORE TWINKLE! I'm in a funk. A big one. It is making me extremely grumpy. I feel like I'm scowling all the time and my spirit and imagination are being crushed and my creative juices are frozen by bone chilling cold winds! I dream of flip-flops, hot dogs on the grill, car rides with the windows down, dipped cones that ACTUALLY MELT! I will stop venting now....but grrrrrrrrr!

Goodbye, my giant red shoe wearing clown friend....

....I shall miss you terribly. I shall miss your fried until they are the perfect shade of gold fries. I shall miss the toasted sesame seed buns on my "treat yourself" Big Mac days. I shall miss creamy chocolaty chocolate shakes. I shall miss that sweet tasting "pretending you are Chick-fil-A" southern chicken sandwich with the little pickle. I shall miss the 10:30 in the morning freshly made because breakfast is no longer being served cheeseburgers. I shall miss your crunchy two bite chicken mcnuggets with BBQ dipping sauce. I shall miss sweet tea with the perfect combination of ice in that non-sweating Styrofoam cup. I shall miss the concern on your drive thru employees faces when they haven't seen me in a few days....

Do not cry for me, my redheaded someone should have shown you how to apply lipstick friend, for in a few months when I can wear pretty "little" summer dresses maybe you will be nothing but a fond memory as I wave at your golden arches when I drive by.

Sidenote: My official goodbye is not until this Sunday so if you see me pulling out of the parking lot between now and then there is no need to scold.

Ooops...

An account of yesterday:

Him: Whatcha doing?

Me: Just finishing up a few things. You?

Him: Wondering if you wanted to do something...

Me: Can I finish this up? Should be about an hour.

Him: Ok.

Skip ahead an hour...

Him: Ready?

Me: Yep!

Him: What would you like to do?

Me: Can we go do this? I really need to get it taken care of.

Him: Ok.

We proceed to spend the afternoon together as always. I go on and on about stuff going on in my life, he listens. Its enjoyable as always. We finish up because he has plans that evening.

Skip ahead a few hours, right before bed...

Me: What are your plans this week? I really need to finish up Christmas shopping but I have left your birthday open unless you already have plans.

There is silence. Very unusual.

Me: It's ok if you have already made plans, we can always celebrate another day. I promise I'm not upset.

Him: Ummm, (insert sweet name he calls me here), I have to tell you something.

Me: Oh no, what?

And I'm thinking if he has already made plans I will bite my lip and suck it up even though I would like to cream him.

Him: Today was my birthday.

I GASP!

Me: No it wasn't! It's Thursday.

Him: Nope. It was my birthday when I got off the phone with you last night. It was my birthday when I asked if you wanted to do something this morning. It was my birthday all afternoon. It is actually my birthday for 15 more minutes.

I am so upset (because even though it is him that has been forgotten, and Lord help him if it was the other way around, its all about me still) that I am speechless.

Me: Well can't we still celebrate it this week?

Him: Nope. Have to wait until next year.

Me: C'mon!

Him: Nope.

Me: But I want to give you your gifts! C'mon!

Him: You have given me the best gift of all. 365 days of not letting you live this down.

Ahahahahahaha! This man. He amazes me. Everyday. In good ways and sometimes bad, but always amazes me. I wish he knew how excited I am to spend the next year making it up to him!!

I wish...

...I could take her pain away.

It seems that in life it is not only your children you want to protect from bad things. Apparently this is true for all important people in your life. You want to wrap them up in your arms and hug it away. Try and make them laugh. Keep their minds off of it. Cry with them when that isn't possible. Beat up (actually my imagination runs wild at what I would like to do to this person but I'm trying to be blogger friendly) the culprit. Take them ice cream and Kleenex. Think of the perfect words to make it all better. Sit there in silence if necessary. However, there is no magic cure. Unfortunately that ol' cliche "Time will heal all" comes into play more than most of us would like.

Just know that you are loved and I am here, my friend, until time has done it's thing.

Oh Christmas Tree...

I wasn't going to blog about my holiday weekend because the grouchy teen and I had a big showdown on Thanksgiving day that ended with us spending our day in separate venues. The showdown involved the typical mother versus teen scenario. I am apparently unreasonable and he is of course selfish. It is a fight as old as time itself, I am sure. However, on very rare, I'm talking when pigs fly and the moon is blue occasions, it just happens....

We put up the tree every year on the Sunday after Thanksgiving. This year was no different except for Bug Juice had a birthday party to attend which involved swimming in the middle of November (heated pool at the Y...no I am not an entirely negligent parent!) so she couldn't leave us to deal with the tree fast enough. With a tree ready to be trimmed, the grouchy teen and I spent one of the most perfect evenings doing so. We started with the many, many, many lights I bought. This was quite and ordeal I assure you. Something about making sure all the plugs are in the right order so that it will plug up with the next strand can be mind boggling, but with a little laughing and maybe a few (close your eyes on this part, mom) under the breath profanities we managed. We then did the garland and finally the best part...THE ORNAMENTS!!

"This one is 19 years-old, mom!!" he says as if it was from the days of dinosaurs walking the earth.

It was the one of a penguin driving a convertible and was given to me by one of my favorite people to commemorate the year I turned sixteen. There is also the one from the year before of a mouse on a bird with a sign that says "flying South" because she knew how much I loved going home to Georgia and the one from the year after of the volleyball-playing moose. I wonder if she knows how much we think of her at Christmas when we pull these out of the ornament box.

I would also like to take a moment here to thank Hallmark for putting the year of the ornament for all grouchy teens to see and for giving them yet another moment to tease their mothers.

It was a special night that he and I got to share together and it makes all the parent/teen battles vanish into then air when these kind of times happen.

A little bit of magic...

Music.

It is the most magical thing.

A song can take you back in time. A song can remind you so strongly of someone that it can take your breath away. A song can bring back a memory so vivid that you swear you were there. A song can leave you crying, laughing, wishing, mourning, at peace.

I have many, many songs that take me to these places. A song about the sun and the rain reminds me of my mother. Another about the light in the darkness...my sisters. A song about a bullfrog of the best teacher I've ever had. A song about not being able to lose me...the kids. I won't bore you with the extremely long list.

This new one was linked to me by my sister because it reminded her of me. The thing is....it reminds ME of me. At least how I want to be...accepting of whatever is to happen. I love you, little sister. Here's to hoping...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJ5DbKEgScs

Things Forgotten....

I've been so obsessed with this birthday coming up that I have forgotten that there are other things to look forward to this month. Stuffing. Friends coming home for the holidays. Christmas decorations start going up. I think the kids and I will have a real tree this year. Stuffing. Some time off from work to spend with family. Stuffing. Towards the end of the month we might get to break out the scarves. OOoooo I love scarves!! My mom usually makes me a carrot cake at some point. Stuffing. The River will start playing Christmas music and I will get to hear Kenny Loggins "Celebrate Me Home" a few hundred times. Good thing it's my favorite. Stuffing. Even my grumpy teenage son gets a little more chipper this time of year. This is going to be fun and did I mention stuffing??